I admittedly have a very Topsy Turvy time in life, it always being a mixed flow like a true Piscean.
Added elements, chemicals, psychology and biochemistry making this more extreme in the realm of polarity, or bi-polarities.
However, I was always certain of my Spiritual direction even if not so, in the multitude of Pantheons, Traditions and Paths within this certainty; they merely adding to my awe as so much could be learned, taught, found, and practised. It providing that diversity, and stimulation of a frequent variety within the same structural Faith as it were.
Paganism is as we all know an umbrella term, for way a many Traditions of Faiths and Practises of Earth-based Spirituality and Magicks, and even wrongfully being placed in a dictionary as a devout non-believer, which couldn’t be farthest from the truth, for what many a Pagan believes is far wider a spectrum then any orthodox Religion or Faith!
My personal interests and practises have taken on such an eclectic conglomeration that it is merely simpler to call myself a Pagan, or define it similarly simple as being a Witch.
Becoming dedicated and seriously practising, studying my path brought a whole new world to me, as there was a never-ending realm to explore, it in turn healed me, helped me and drove me forward during stagnant times; it helped even in my mundane life, work and career paths. I became better in many area’s of my existence, and progressed readily. My biochemical and psychological conditions still veered it’s ugly head regularly, but somehow there was always something to try and divert my attention or a small shining light to get me through somehow.
Slowly, my Pagan life started being my daily life, as I replaced stagnancy with study, illness with becoming a hermit, and gaining a deeper understanding of the path I was on Spiritually. Admittedly this has led me into such depths that at times it has seemed detrimental, however I realise it is a lesson to which I must learn, else an unheard guidance, or merely a spell of ill health to which I had caused myself more-so then anything else!
Having never quite felt that Wicca was my true path, although many structural elements of it were a part of my practise, I was always drawn to a more ancient leaning, and a vast directional way of thinking, incorporating many ideals, knowledge, wisdom and magick.
Yet after over a decade of working and study, it became so that I wished to have accomplishments that were more then written in my personal journals, or Book of Shadows, therefore needing a teaching or Initiatory structure. A few Covens were tried and tested and found to be more in the hierarchal bitchcraft way of working, to which I refuse to subscribe to, even today in the Initiatory path I am on I will refuse to be a part of this ‘he said, she said’ type of mentality, it being sometimes necessary when one bad seed has grown too large, but for the most part I find that this display of ‘spiritual’ with a mouth of ‘negative’ is far from healing, or helping the Universe, least of all work of or for the Goddess/God/Deities.
Eventually I began to attend Festivals/Celebrations at Clonegal Castle, the Founding home of The Fellowship of Isis. Founded by Lawrence Durdin-Robertson and his sister Lady Olivia Robertson. Having been a member nearly a decade, also having moved closer to the Castle’s proximity, I started to attend and quickly began Adept training within it’s Spiral of the Adepti Path.
Two years now has had me on a constant training and in turn teaching regime within the Fellowship; I am Adept, I run an Iseum of my own, offering training of Adepthood to others, Iseum of Hekate, Phosphorus, Soteira & Psychopompus Hermeneus http://www.wix.com/iseumhekatehermeneus/training
has now successfully recruited, taught, mentored and Consecrated Adepts.
I became an energy channeller, in healing energies, Reiki Master in two traditions of Usui Reiki, alongside a myriad of additional attunements and healing energy systems to which I work extremely well in, and it mixes well with my natural psychic, intuitive and divination abilities.
From this progression I was called by Hekate, which to me has been the most driving forced connection to Deity I have ever felt, it is constant stream of synchronicities, work related materials, projects, study and teaching. Through Hekate I have become, Spiritual Teacher/Mentor, Healer/Channeller, Published Writer, and it is still ongoing…
…After the successful release of Hekate: Her Sacred Fires, www.sacredfires.co.uk to which I was a contributing writer, published by Avalonia http://avaloniabooks.co.uk/221/ which is now in it’s second edition, and the interest that flowed in from this project and it’s specifically designed worldwide Rite of Her Sacred Fires, written by Sorita D’Este http://www.sorita.co.uk/ having over 3000 participants partook to perform this Rite on May 27th 2010… Hekate has kept the ball rolling, the interests open and is making in my opinion a resurgence into the modern world.
I have written more pieces related to Hekate since this project, the contributors and devotee’s globally have felt her guiding them closer and to each other, alongside new ideas, artworks, compositions both written and musical, and even video, the call of Hekate has become astonishing as each and every one who follows her, are beginning to connect to each other. This in part is due to the fervent adoration and fast working of Sorita D’Este, whom when she is called to an idea or guided, acts immediately.
It is thanks to Hekate and Sorita’s devotion to working for Hekate, that we now have the new project: Covenant of Hekate in our midst http://hekatecovenant.com/ where likeminded individuals can become members, learn, offer teachings, information, gatherings, local workgroups, workshops, and is a Global Covenant to and for Hekate, her Torchbearer’s, Devotee’s, Children and Servants alike, it will be the point of contact for anything related to the Goddess Hekate, in this modern world, on this physical sphere, it is here, that you will gain access to all things Hekate, anywhere in the world, someone will be a point of contact for you and any information you require or desire in relation to the Ancient Goddess and Queen Hekate, who makes things happen assuredly, and sometimes so fiercely fast one can feel completely overwhelmed, but it is this, that I am certain, is the one thing tipping the balance in my favour, against the polarity of angst, struggles, darkness, when I can proudly state I am learning the Mysteries, even if it takes me into the abyss which at times is so dark, but that at the end of it is Hekate directing me to the light…
…I am Honoured to be a Founding Torchbearer in the (CoH) Covenant of Hekate, and to continue to learn/study, teach and mentor in Hekate’s name…
…During this latest ‘ball rolling’ I have also gained a Sponsorship to begin preparations for my Ordination into the Clergy/Priesthood of the Fellowship of Isis as a Priestess.
So my initial reason for this post was this…
…how when in my daily life, health struggles and mundane issues, which can at times bring me to a place of utter despair…
…can so much good, progression and divine light be brought in from my spiritual side simultaneously?
I am of course wishing this was spread moreover the entirety of my life, even if spread thinner, but perhaps then it wouldn’t be palpable, as with everything, whether scientifically or divinely, there always has to be Polarity, negative/positive, dark/light, good/bad, black/white…I do so wish to have less issues of struggle and fearful phobias and the like, but maybe if I start shifting my thinking and focus over to the spiritual progressiveness and the honoured achievements I have succeeded in and the new ones begun, with acknowledgements and a wider knowledge of and connection to some extremely talented and spiritual folk in this world, to which some I can now call and consider friends…
…then perhaps that shall be more manifest, and the darker elements staying more hidden in their shadows, and less domineering to my existence, and with an equal part of attention instead.
One can but try.